The relic resembles a thick walking stick, a little over three feet long, "sleek and smooth with a creamy eggshell color base with swirls of caramelized deep orange … a shiny relic of desire." Specifically, it's a "penis bone from the gigantic, and long ago extinct Arctic Walrus." Inuits call it "The Oosik" ($19.95 in paperback, independently published; also for Amazon Kindle).
Framed as a historical investigation for the Journal of American Rare Objects, the story traces how the Oosik becomes a "spiritual relic" once artisans etch various images, including a "female face with antlers, which to them was Pukimna, the mother and goddess overseeing the reincarnation of revered walrus and caribou."
The first known trade of the Oosik comes in Western Alaska in 1870 and its perceived value excites thieves and charlatans and even pricks the conscience of a few, before making its winding way back home in 2017. It changes hands again and again, and Nitzel's account of coincidence, comeuppance and weaponization as the Oosik travels the world is enticingly bizarre.
Take laborer Sanford Tinius who brings the Oosik to Mount Rushmore in 1934 where he is assigned jackhammer work on the back of the monument. He imagines the Oosik along with America's "most important paperwork" would reside in a secret chamber "for a future society to discover."
Years later Seoras Surratt, high on peyote in northwest New Mexico, decides to become a cult leader and appropriates the unattended Oosik; but soon it's "placed into the trunk of a mint condition Corvette and quickly driven away" to Arizona where it remains for almost 43 years.
After that, as a group of five friends travel the world exploring religious relics, with astonishing developments, the Oosik eventually arrives home in Alaska--a notable expression of authorial prestidigitation.
