Each book, independently published, is $5.00 in paperback (also for Amazon Kindle). “Dancing On The Ceiling” is a meditation on suffering. “Every adult says/ The nightmares in daylight/ Will never go away/ But you have to get over it/ The truth is, you can’t/ Cause the nightmares/ I have in daylight/ Are one hundred percent real/ Not monsters under my bed/ But people attacking me/ Bad memory after bad memory/ Flooding my mind/ Searing my brain” the poet writes.
“Dancing In A Minefield” is explicit about poetry as therapy. “Can you explain/ Why I must pour out these words/ Or risk losing my sense of self?” And: “I could no more cease writing/ Than I could unmake myself”—and yet there are moments that nearly do unmake the poet:
“I’m dancing in a minefield/ Twirling amidst the explosions/ Wondering when I’ll shatter/ And fall apart once more” but then: “As I write I find the truth/ For I have answers I must find/ And they are hidden in my mind” amidst trauma, fear, shame. “Being mentally ill/ And disabled as a result/ Of said mental illness/ Means that PTSD/ Affects every aspect of my life” the poet says.
“Dancing In A Storm,” the third volume, is “about survival”: “I’m writing this/ For future me/ I want to remember/ That I fought/ To stay alive/ It wasn’t always easy/ But it was always worth it/ And when the storm clouds lift/ As they always do/ I’ll remember/ That the sky/ Was crying for me” writes the poet.
The poet’s task is not to escape the past, but to integrate it with one’s very self. “I’m autistic/ And changing that/ Would mean I wouldn’t/ Recognize myself/ I don’t know who I’d be/ Without it”—Hill’s writing takes the reader on a harrowing yet celebratory journey as the poet is “writing myself sane.”
